Grandiosity

It's either gradiosity or suicide, so here i sit.  at least i'll dispense with caps, to save one lousy key press.  

escapism has been modus operandi so far.  apractice of "religion", not christian, has been a defining event but lost via apathy and a basic laziness.  being a "practitioner" is much different than simply attending some pious event once a week.  now that my mood for running away has waned, mainly because i'm too tired, makes me turn to my relatives, my tribe long dead to make sense of some small items on my drop dead list.

how they will communicate becomes a guessing game for me but writing it out must be my purpose and since i have used a lot of ink, i might as well just start bringing up the paper and writing it randomly here as well.  i have no time to waste on doubt or giving a shit what ANYONE else thinks.  who has time for that?

in front of me the continuous stream of sunday traffic is on a small dot screen before me.  a perspective that is cut in half with rage at what has happened to our trails and the animals that trod it, not happy, but not extinct either.  two freeway directions to hell, with poison boxes rolling it's occupants to sunday services or a late breakfast.

screw them.  one day there will be a HOV lane, but the "H" will mean "horse".

a little angry are we?

greed is good for a select few, native people have known that for hundreds of years.  

ordinary citizens may not know, but they have been stealing from us, via their federal govt, for every minute that the bureau of indian affairs has been in existence.  check out the cobell case currently in litigation to understand that the feds will owe us TRILLIONS for their greed and dishonesty towards their "wards", each tribal person with an individual indian money accounts at the BIA.  

Should be no surprise that not only is the US govt responsible for bungling incompetence with Bush but for general thievery and outright and illegal land-grabbing in the past under such scum presidents like Jackson and scum senators like Gorton.

sadly, history has been sanitized to reflect the hero pilgrim, instead of the true image of the dirty, lying, thieving, ignorant newcomer with diseases to spare, sundering everything in their path with the glee of knowing they will have everything for free.

it's no wonder we have to suffer this, it's been in the making for a long time.  greed is only good for the lowest common people, those willing to steal, and the rest of us have to pay.